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IGNITE The Self-Talk

This last week I became very tired of myself. I was very annoyed with myselfIt was similar to the feeling I get at the end of a vacation with the kids and the sound of their voice makes me cringeInitially, I did not realize that it was me I was annoyed withDuring some quiet time to myself, I was reflecting on my mood and general thoughtsI realized, “I am really annoying right nowI don’t really like myself right nowAnd, WHY?”  My self-talk has been complaining about thoughts and reactions happening in most of my daily life situationsAccording to www.healthdirect.gov.au, self-talk is the inner voice that combines conscious thoughts with internal beliefs and biases to create an internal monologueI loved the question I asked myself- WHY am I thinking this way or saying these things to myself?   In this episode of IGNITE, we will discuss how to acknowledge our unconscious self-talk and  how to modify these conversations to create a healthier space within ourselvesJoin me for a quick deep dive into how our thoughts are creating us and affecting our world. 

The little or loud voice in our head can change the course of our day, week, .... LIFEA quote from Toni Morrison’s book Beloved states, “You are your best thing.”  Tarana Burke and Brenè Brown wrote a book titled, You Are Your Best ThingIt is a prominent phrase packed with meanings and feelings to be interpreted in a variety of ways.  Our inner voice directly influences our behavior and the energy we gift to othersThat little voice is sometimes stealthy and whispering softly when we don’t even realize it is thereIt wasn’t until I reflected back on my mood and everything that has happened in my world the last few days, that I realized I had not been my best cheerleaderWhich led to me realizing if I had been kinder to myself in my self-talk, I would have been feeling better in certain situationsWhich could have led to different outcomesI would have had a bit more confidence in myselfI would have been more peaceful, and THAT would have made a huge difference in my day and in my relationshipsOne of the best ways to acknowledge what we are saying to ourselves is to briefly PAUSEAny amount of PAUSE is going to benefit usMake this PAUSE the questions, “What am I feeling right now at this momentIs it true?” I will be in the middle of grocery shopping and ready to yell at the next person who calls or texts my phoneWhen I PAUSE for a second and analyze the annoyed feeling, I realize grocery stores overwhelm me right nowWhen I dive deeper past the annoyed feeling, I hear guiltI feel guilty and ashamed that I do not want to deal with kids or partners or parents that may need me but I am occupied with somethingI am judging myself and telling myself that I am a bad person for being annoyedTHAT’S the self-talk I reshapeI decided I should gift myself time and energy by making it a quick grocery store tripIt is a form of self-care that gives me the space needed to show up for others with the energy of love and acceptance I want to give to themBeing mindful of what we hear our thoughts telling us or what we feel our thoughts giving us, gives us powerThis power allows us to problem solve and take care of ourselvesThe same power we use to push clouds away from our Star Power.   

Pushing clouds away from our Star Power is a beautiful visual of adjusting our self-talk to sound more like who we want to be and who we truly areAnswer this question, “Would you say the same things to someone else that you say to yourself?”  Consider this question, “Would you hang out with someone if they said to you what you tell yourself?”  If you are a kind, generous, loving human being- which you are because you volunteer your time and energy to coach and empower amazing girls every week- then the answer to both of those questions is, “NO!”  Since the answer is, “No, I wouldn’t say these things to one of my GOTR girls or kids or spouse,” then we should stop saying it to our number one person- ourselvesI have been very annoyed with myself lately like I would be with a person who consistently has negative commentsAnd just like a plant, if it is watered with good water and given ample sunshine, it will bloomIf we shower ourselves with grace and kind words, we will blossom and bloomThe cloud is pushed away and the Star Power beams through our energy, thoughts, and feelings radiating goodness withinPay it forward to yourself by starting with your self-talkShine your Star Power on yourself and be your best thing! 

 

Shayla A is the Coach Mentor for Girls on the Run Kansas CityHer background comes from the classroom, coaching, day treatment schools, wellness, and advocating for children with special needsShe enjoys empowering and advocating for girls and coaches in every challenge and celebrationConnect with her for support and assistance this season via Leigh Krtec.   

 

 

 

BOOK LIST TO EMPOWER YOUR SELF-TALK: 

Who I Am: Words I Tell Myself by Susan Verde 

The Self-Talk Workout  by Rachel Goldsmith Turow 

Your Thoughts Matter by Esther Pia Cordova 

The Power of Positive Self-Talk by Kim Fredrickson 

 

TO WATCH A VIDEO ON HOW TO IGNITE YOUR SELF-TALK: 

 

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We inspire girls to be joyful, healthy and confident using a fun, experience-based curriculum which creatively integrates running. Non-profit girl empowerment after-school program for girls.

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