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IGNITE Your Struggles

Many of my college professors emphasized the importance of the “5-15 second wait time” for children to answer a question. Often times while teaching, I had to remind myself of this when I was anxious to get the lesson learned and completed. I would sometimes feel disappointed that the student did not have the answer to my question immediately. I felt uncomfortable with their struggle to find the answer in their brain bank that I was trying to help them grow. But, the reality of it is that their struggle IS what grows their brain and makes it stronger! In this episode of IGNITE we are going to discuss why struggling is important for our brain growth, self-esteem, and confidence.

Dieter F. Uchtdorf said, “It’s your reaction to adversity, not adversity itself that determines how your life’s story will develop.” We learn quite a bit about ourselves and others when in the depths of a struggling chapter or season of our life. We learn how physically strong we are as we step over the finish line. We learn how mentally strong we are when the big project is finally complete. We learn how emotionally strong we are after the dust has settled from a big argument. We learn about our limits, our patterns, our beliefs, and our skills. Struggling is a natural component of life. Struggling enhances our life. It leads to fulfillment and a stronger sense of success. Our sense of pride increases and we feel like we can conquer anything that comes our way! Confidence and self-esteem, full speed ahead! This persistence is directly related to how we struggled through the adversity.

Through each struggle we journey through, big and small, deep and surface-level, we develop new abilities to persist and persevere up the mountain. We develop problem-solving and creative thinking skills that we did not have prior. When we struggle with something for days, weeks, months, years, or 5-15 seconds our brain kicks into flex mode with our analytical thinking skills. We try and try and try, again and again and again. With each trial, each attempt, each step forward, our brain is producing myelin around our synapses that connect our neurons. The more connected neurons we have, the stronger our brain signals and critical thinking skills. Nelson Mandela said, “Do not judge me by my success, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.” When we fall down, the drive to get back up teaches us what is important and what matters to us. It requires intellectual effort and emotional resilience which increases myelin production and strengthens our synapse pathways.

We set goals and know it is going to take some change and hard work. We set goals to feel a sense of accomplishment. We set goals knowing there will be a struggle(s) along the way. Our goals can be hourly, daily, monthly, or seasonally. The struggle is the part that grows our girls. The struggle is the part that empowers our girls. My most favorite, empowering life quote comes from Rocky Balboa (Sylvester Stallone), “Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!”

The struggle is a gift we support our girls through as they succeed and soar! Continue to reach for your goals and climb with your girls, coaches, and team. We will see you at the finish line at the top of every mountain!

Shayla A is the Coach Mentor for Girls on the Run Greater Kansas City. Her background comes from the classroom, coaching, day treatment schools, wellness, and advocating for children with special needs. She enjoys empowering and advocating for girls and coaches

in every challenge and celebration. Connect with her for support and assistance this season via call, text, or email. shaylaaranda@gmail.com | 816-284-9770

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